Human Hamster Balls

Finally, a safe and humane way to abandon your children.

For decades, scientists have been working on a means for parents to put their children in giant plastic hamster balls. Not only have they done it, they've gone one step further and blasphemed jesus by giving us the ability to walk on water. These things will do for the future of watertravel what segways did for sidewalk travel. Which is make you look like a complete douchebag while riding one.


For only$499 you can provide your spoiled children with endless fun and endless opportunities to injure themselves. Tired of children? Just leave them in there for longer than 20 minutes and it's the lake's problem now. Should you decide to keep said children in the off chance they grow up to become president like that phone commercial promises, then might I suggest buying Zipper Lubricant.

The zipper lubricant though advertised as being "small and cheap" is very much not included in the purchasing price. Instead it is available for an additional $8.99, and is sure to keep your zipper lubed and satisfied. No doubt it's only a matter of time until they release a Ribbed version of the water walking ball, for her pleasure.

To buy this toy your kids will use twice and then forget about, visit:
www.uswaterball.com