TROLLS movie will undoubtedly be awful

As if a Smurfs movie wasn't bad enough, Hollywood is finding new ways to ruin your childhood with things that are no longer relevant.

According to The Hollywood Reporter, Dreamworks Animation is all set to take something you loved growing up, & mangle it into something your dog hocked up, then ate again. For those of you who already can't wait to "Get Smurf'd," you now have something else on the horizon to look forward to. I give you the Good Luck Trolls.

I know what you're thinking, didn't they already make a movie about trolls? And didn't the sequel have nothing to do with trolls? Well rest assured this isn't Troll 2.

This will be much worse. Not only are they naked and violently colorful, i'm sure they'll unnecessarily hop aboard the 3D-train. They've already ruined Alvin & The Chipmunks, Transformers, G.I. Joe, and Garfield, but why stop there?! Here's a list of other childhood toys & memories Hollywood should ruin by turning into crappy non-Pixar movies:

Jump Rope,
Beanie Babies,
Cat's Cradle,
Pogs,
Tamagotchi,
Skip-it,
Hula Hoops,
Super Soaker,
Nerf Guns,
Slip'n'Slide,
Nap Time,
Lincoln Logs,
Lisa Frank Stationary,
Tinker Toys,
Big Wheels,
Diapers,
Crayola Crayons,
Power Wheels,
Every Breakfast Cereal.

All of these aforementioned things are horribly unsuited to be made into feature films, so they assuredly will be. But don't worry, the studios will attempt to make them "hip" and "cool" by inserting Brendan Fraser along with CG talking animals that wear sunglasses! Rest assured if any of them are a Christmas movie they will undoubtedly feature Tim Allen.

Now how do we get them to turn this into a full length?